"Oh Come On, You CAN'T Be Serious"

Wait a minute, am I hearing this correctly? Your mother is coming to stay with us for six weeks? Do you remember what happened last time she stayed with us, and how incredibly high maintenance she was? Her constant nagging about the house being dirty? And her trying to indoctrinate our children with her evangelical relgious views? Does any of that ring a bell?

I'd just like to remind you that it took me 3 months to recover emotionally from that experience. Needless to say, it's something I'd like to NOT have the misfortune of having to deal with again. So you get on the horn right now and call her and let her know that six weeks just isn't going to fit with our schedules. You tell her that we're really sorry and all that, but it's just not going to happen. Heck, I'm not even sure if I can deal with her for six HOURS, let along six weeks.

She can stay ONE week - and that's my final offer.